I went to a Tastefully Simple party the other night at a friend's house. On my way home I realized that sometimes I forget who I am. I forget that I need other people in my life. I've become more of a homebody. I'm ok with that....I like just hanging out most nights with hubby or sewing in the basement. When he was deployed I had a great balance. I enjoyed spending my time at home watching movies or scrapbooking. And I loved having a full calendar of taco Tuesday nights, fondue, bunco, happy hour with my work crew, and brunch with my girl friends. It's probably changed a little since I moved here....ok well changed a lot. He's home now, it was a new place, and I don't have as many close friends as I did. So I expected it to change when we moved. I guess until a few nights ago I didn't realize how much it had.
I stayed a little later at the party just chatting with a few of the girls that didn't go home right afterwards. It was really nice just hanging out and chatting about whatever random things came to mind. I laughed a lot and had a great time. On my way home I realized that I had acted more like my old self. The fun, going out, busy, self. The person who enjoys spending time out of the house instead of inside it alone. I need to find that balance again. I'm going to focus on going out even if I don't feel like it sometimes. I know once I go I always have a great time. And I'm going to enjoy the time I spend at home. With the baby and winter coming about the same time I think I'm going to be indoors more and more. My life will certainly take on a new meaning and I'll have a whole new set of priorities. But I can still be me, spending time at home just hanging out, and getting out and about with the girls.....just now with a little mini me to bring along. :)
Saturday, October 16, 2010
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it's so funny you blogged about that because those feelings are often on my mind. sometimes i wonder if gene and i had a weekend to ourselves would we actually do something or just stay at home. i look at other people's fb pics of going out and feel slightly envious because i remember when i was carefree, sometimes i don't know if i know how to have fun anymore. people make comments about my make up but it's my way of fighting the feeling that sometimes i lose myself in being a mom, especially being a stay at home mom. i need something to hold onto to remember who i was before becoming a parent because i think it's easy to forget when you're in the middle of diapers, errands and parenting. you're life will definitely change in so many ways after she's born but it will be one of the greatest changes in your life. it will teach you things about yourself that you never realized and give you an inner strenth like no other because your life isn't about just you anymore.
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